I think if we really had to discuss and reflect on our group's problems that can be improved.... it is that
We all cared too much.... about our own works.
I find that sometimes we put in a lot of effort and mindset into our segment that we tend to forget/ neglect other's segment... like we think about them but that's all we do.... too much thinking, wondering and way too little actions....
I chose this 4 segment project, because I really like all four of our ideas and I really see the potential in this, how they all weave into each other...
I chose this because I thought, by choosing this, we don't have to make the decision to decide which ideas we don't want to do and which one we want to..... I thought that, by choosing this, I could avoid that trouble and even better.... I could do ALL FOUR!
Yet, when the pressure kicks in, non of us could help or have the luxury to care about others at all.... we were just so involved in our own individual work that we totally neglected the whole.
Sometimes, we all end up caring about the so little stuffs that we forgot to look at the whole picture.
It is always good/essential that when you paint, to take one step back, take a breath and have a look at the whole.
To stay in focus, we must not keep our eyes concentrate on one point, it blurs our vision instead.
There is soooo much stuff that I could have done to make our work better and I don't feel like this is our final at all. This is truely a great idea and could be so much better if we can really find a way of working 'together' as a group! We have four amazing talents in our team and all of us are so different from one another... yet by doing our own work... we ended up staying in our comfort zone and it's just such a waste of such an amazing opportunity... to get out there and explore! to endure the conflicts and challenges together... rather than just "getting this assignment done and get an HD".... In fact, I don't want an HD, I want our work to be a challenge! both for us and the fucker who watch it!
I realised how inconsistance my blog posts are.... If our aim was to document our process of learning and the journey of the semester, this blog is the equivalent of a jigsaw puzzle that's pretty much missing half of its pieces, incomplete and jagged....
I feel like in my mind there is always so much to say and so much to show, yet when it comes to actually writing them down into blog posts..... hmmm....
I think it's the mismatched pace between the way I think and the way I write that make me feel so inadequate whenever I write... that goes along with writing essays and making speeches..... I'm always stuttering :/ To improve my blog post, it's not just a matter of actually writing a post every day, but more looking into the root of the problem. It's not that I don't like writing, it's just that I hate and often feel constipated whenever I write! Hence, I often just avoid it and persuade myself to use as little words as possible and tried use images instead to express my thoughts in it's arbitrary and metaphorical form.... Recently, I feel like that's not much of a solution but a cop out and I really want to change that! To be more fluent in the way I think and the way I express myself.
As the wind blows and brushes its way through us, came the enlightenment and the bloom that spring had been waiting for...
Our thoughts as streams of water, gushing down the edge of the mind, smooth and calm, flowing in an unwavering pace.
It's not enough to stretch our hands forward trying to content it... We got to feel it not grabbing it. Direct its flow into the writing, keep its flow at pace... arghhhh I lost it....
Sorry... I tried to fix/ restructure the last sentences and I lost it.... (funny how the first two just came so easily and randomly, I didn't even intend on writing them at all, I just needed a start to get to my point. Yet, when I just about to get into the point I've already lost it....) It's not the writing, it's because I stopped the flow and got carried away by the text and its content. While I was writing I was also thinking about the way I read and why I hate to read! It's to do with pace again, it just seemed extremely slow when I read. The way to explain the slowness is like trying to load a internet page using RMIT internet and safari.... it just lags and I hate when I am forced to blink at the screen, staring at a blank page, slowly loading its images and text. (Bare in mind the difference between "timeless" and "slowness".... Mad men is timeless, listening to a 3am empty street is timeless, but a traffic jam is just fucking torturing and slow.) That's why I like watching film and movie a lot more, because I feel at pace, it has its speed and pace , so I can easily surf through its wave, sail by the direction of its wind. (In motion picture, the pace is a given, we don't have to conduct or create it... We just have to follow the flow, 25 frames per second, like a train ride, u get on for an hour and half and you get off, arriving at whatever destination it brings you and you can go on to explore the land onwards) I should treat reading and writing as paintings and musics, it allows room for imagination and abstraction. If I can grasp the way to read, I think it will help my writing a lot! Read more is what everyone kept saying, and it sure is the way to learn! I look forward to the day I can grow to actually enjoy a read and get hooked on just like my endless nights of watching films after films until dawn!
Sorry I didn't finish the writing, not today but perhaps tomorrow.... lol yeh right!
This reminded me of a painting that I did back in yr 11... Fortune flows
Thought I was ganna start my Asian Cinema essay tonight... ended up writing this random post for 4 hours.... 3am already (Being enjoying my Tripple Monday the whole afternoon! Homland, Dexter and Walking Dead!!!) ... Now it's Dial M for Murder time!!
我 saw 那一封信... I'm just ganna poo on this blog for a change! I don't want to feel lk hving diarrhoea anymore... just whatever comes out... an experiment... and that's see how it goes.... #PrivateInPublic
Who wants to see a guy taking a poo in the middle of the street? Um... no... because he gets run over by the car....
All this time of trying desperately to figure a way to capture the world through blind sights, the answer had always been there right in front of us....
Today, we had another 4 short interviews (vox pops) with Melissa's friends, and it was really nice getting to know them. It's a shame that Rukas and Thao didn't come, but still they can listen to the interviews later
One of my main objective today was to convince the talents to help me do this experiment of taking photographs using disposable cameras and HURRAYYYY!! Mission Succeeded! Even though, it might not make it in time for the final screening of our documentary, I've decided that I want to make a longer documentary that focus on blindness. I went to Vision Australia with vox pops in mind, however, what I got was much much more than I expected.... Each of them has a different kind of condition, personality and character. They all have their own stories to tell, and I feel like I should not just take their words out of context and cut/remix them into montages. This segment is more of a mood piece like our other segments, using music/sound as the base of narration that target at the audience's experience rather than the talent. Just like how Paul points out about Thao's "Type is ____" wheel, the animation itself is great already, we don't need random voices from the vox pops saying the words. If the piece evoke the sense of fear or happiness, we don't need to label it with a voice saying "SCARY" or "JOY"... just show rather than tell.
As much as I'm inspired by this semester's doco project, I'm also suffocating from it! It's so much pressure and frustrating when almost till the end of the semester, my mind is still stuffed in a cloud of unkonwn and uncertainty. It's like when I write an essay, I do so much research and plaining, but when it comes to execution.... arghhhhh HELLL! It's like that singing egg in Harry potter, idea sounds so beautiful and intriguing underwater, but when u take it out of the water, it just sound like noise, torturing our ear.... if only I could portray that state of mind submerged under the water through my work. If only the mind can be looked at as a piece of artwork, that can be read by everyone else, so I don't have to go through the struggle of taking it out! If you have seen "Synecdoche, New York".... I totally understand Charlie Kaufman's film! I'm so far off topic....
Never mind, back to topic..... While we were explaining to the talents about the disposable camera experiment, the first question is always: "What kind of photographs should I take?" Without hesitation, we quickly replied, "Anything that might interest you, any sound, smell, or things that you appreciate!" It's that easy and so much fun! Same as the way this doco ought to be -.-
Since we've decided on the topic of the documentary, I've gone out with my camera trying to capture the world of the blind numerous time, but half of the time I had no idea why and what I was shooting... I just see and then I shoot. FAIL! Today, I finally realised that the world of the blind is not about how it looked but what it evoked. "It's textile, like chopping food!" Melissa explains I should not cared so much about the framing or subject/movement in the frame, I should focus on the "Smell" "Sound" "Touch" of each shot rather then the "Look"! I've focused too much on the compositions and subjects that I forgot to appreciate everything else. Sometimes, when I walk on the street with my camera on, the place is so refreshing and nice that I don't even want to take my camera out but just enjoy the mood. I fear that by taking out the camera, immediately, I will switch into a shooting mood, picking out stuff to shoot and then the mood is ruined. Maybe, I should have tried to shoot like our blind talents with their disposable cameras, forget about the look and focus on other stuffs, and I'm sure the things I shot would have been much more interesting and different. It's a shame that I've only come to realise this a week before the final cut is due and I've already got most of my plained shots shot and ready for edit. "Should I just give up? or should I just keep chasing pavements? Even if it leads nowhere.....?" I donno, just smile and keep on walking! God Bless!
Meant to post this weeks ago, just couldn't upload it to Vimeo. I wasn't too happy about our observational practice during tuesday's tute, so I took the opportunity to spent my Saturday afternoon exploring the mode. Yes, this time I "walked" instead of riding on that sneaky city-circle-looked-alike tram!
I've decided not to write the letter to Madlink and do a blog post about it instead, not to complain but to share my thoughts on the matter. Paying $150 at once is heaps!!! and totally ruined my day! However, when I think about it, it's been 7 years since I've been taking that tram every week without buying any tickets... If I were really to write a letter to them, I should be writing to them complaining about not being able to have concession card when I'm paying full fee for education at Melbourne! Nevertheless, people who knows me will know how much I LOVE writing.... so I kept walking and who knows how long it's been, I've walked away from my house to the McDonald's at Flinder Station.... That's have lunch under the clocks of Flinder Station, guess what I had for lunch? KFC of course! Since I often ate Macus at Fed Square, I will have KFC across the road for a change
Observational experiment - A Saturday Afternoon at Flinder Station
The City is a restless tale of stories and characters constantly in a state of flux. It's spirit is best captured through its rhythm. In a way that movement of the passing by and the bestilled conducted an artifact that could only be observe/ captured in motion. Its essence lies within its impressionistic character rather than an articulated rigid form of narration.